Shit just hasn’t been going all to well lately.  I use to be best friends with this girl Sam for about 2 years.  I don’t know why or how but one day we kinda just feel apart and stopped talking.  We literally would spend every night talking on the phone and we’d text all day too.  I stayed up with her so many times when I could barely stay awake because I loved her and wanted to be a good friend.  Then all the sudden it just stopped.  I don’t know why.  I miss her so much and wish things were like they use to be.  I sent her a text today and we talked for about 10 minutes until she stopped answering.  I just wish we could go back to the times when everything was better.  No matter what happened between us you’ll always be my best friend and I’ll always love you.  

Today I also realized how lonely I really am.  I barely talk to anyone and it sucks.  All I want is for my friends to start actually trying to hang with me and to stop ignoring me.  And when it comes to girls, I’m just lost.  I don’t talk to any girls, like at all.  The only ones I do talk to live like 2000 miles away.  It be nice to have a girlfriend, someone who likes me, or just someone who had a crush on me.  It be nice to feel wanted for once.  And chances are, if you’re crushing on me or like me, I’ll probably end up liking you too.  All my friends have girlfriends and I’m just so tired of being lonely.  I don’t wanna settle for someone though, but I never usually do that.  I want to be wanted, is that to much to ask for? I just want a cute girl who likes pop punk, baseball, hockey and movies.  I am pretty certain there has to be a girl like that in the South Jersey/Philly area.

I am just so tired of life right now.  I am tired of school, people and just everything.  The only good thing is that I don’t wanna cut, which is great, but still.  I hope something or someone turns my life around soon, that be awesome

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